Should children be required to address their teachers by "sir" and "ma'am"?

Yes: 71% (654 out of 922)
No: 29% (268 out of 922)

"Yes, sir." "No, sir." The idea of requiring these forms of address clearly polarizes people. Almost universally, the people who favor requiring these forms of address in school believe the use of "Sir" or "Ma'am" is a way of introducing children to showing respect for teachers and elders. Virtually every "Yes" voter who commented used the word respect. One "Yes" voter commented, "One of the largest problems in school today is an absence of respect for authority. Responding to teachers with 'yes, sir' or 'no, ma'am' is only a beginning. But we could use some beginnings in our schools." Another "Yes" voter reflected on his/her own experience, "I went to two different schools, one public one private. It was much nicer and more respectful when you had to. Also it became a habit which was carried out easily in the rest of life."

A number of "Yes" voters referenced their own roots in the south and expressed disappointment that what had been a southern tradition for them was not being practiced in school today by their children.

Most interestingly, virtually every comment we received from "No" voters expressed the belief that the alternative of Mr. Mrs. or Miss would do just fine. One "No" voter put it succinctly, "Being respectful and polite is very important. I think that the appropriate Mr./Mrs. or Ms. would be sufficient."

One of the most repeated questions we receive from interviewers and audiences around the country is if rudeness and incivility are on the rise in society today. Furthermore, they want to do something about the perceived increase in rudeness. The fact they want to do something about rudeness is much more important than whether people in general are ruder today than at some point in the past.

The question that this week's poll really asks is, "Can you require respect?" Quite obviously, many people, the majority of respondents to the poll, are willing to try to require it in an effort to bring respect back into our lives. We're not convinced that respect can be required. Such efforts to create rules identifying respect as the use of a specific word miss the point of what respect really is and may actually have the reverse effect.

The real key is that we work to earn respect from others. Teachers or others who work with children should expect to be treated with respect, but they also have an obligation to earn the respect of the children by the way they treat the children. Respect has to be earned and given back to the children. We can't demand it of children and then not respect them ourselves. When earned, whether an adult is addressed as "Sir" or Ma'am" or Mr./Mrs./Ms. or even by a nickname or first name, the respect in the way the person is addressed is what really counts.

Back to Results Archive