Ten Basics for Remarriage
While many of these guidelines apply to any wedding, some are specific to encore weddings.
- Work together; the decisions about an encore wedding should be shared.
- If you have children, tell them first--no matter what their ages.
- Be realistic about budget. Even if you can afford to be extravagant or you have financial assistance from family, determine early what you can afford and stick to your limits.
- Plan your celebration around traditions and interests that are significant to you and have positive associations for your children, family, and friends.
- Talk with your officiant about ways to include your families. Review the wording of traditional services and texts for appropriateness.
- Be sure that all legal, financial, and emotional issues are finalized and put to rest. Discuss any prenuptial legal agreements carefully, and be sure that you have settled matters from previous marriages.
- By the time you begin planning your wedding, put away engagement and wedding rings from previous marriages. You can save them for the next generation or have stones reset into other jewelry. Widows and widowers should no longer wear rings from an earlier marriage, even on their right hands.
- Register for gifts if you want. Even if you don't expect gifts, many guests will want to give them. Registries are helpful to those trying to select something that couple would like to have. Be sure to register in a range of prices.
- Avoid publicly resurrecting the past. An encore wedding celebration isn't the place for remarks about ex-spouses or even heartfelt references to deceased partners.
- Thank everyone--in person and by note--who helped make the wedding a success.
